Skyros Blog
There is a lot written on the topic of Meditation, and many people understand the possible benefits of meditating, however they still find it hard in practice. Some start with good intentions and then gradually stop doing it.
Let’s look first at what gets in the way.
1. It is difficult to keep up a daily practice. I always say that the main thing that can go wrong with meditation is to stop doing it.
2. People have an idea of what it “should” feel like when meditation and feel they can’t achieve it. You are not seeking enlightenment.
3. Many follow a form of meditation that doesn’t work for them. People may try TM, which uses an inner repeated mantra, but there are many alternatives involving, for example, breath, movement, sound, or a visual focus that might suit them better.
It is important to differentiate between the practice of meditation and being in a meditative state, which is an altered state of consciousness. One might lead to the other, but it shouldn’t be seen as a goal, as this adds to the feeling of not being good enough. Somebody asked the Dalai Lama if he now found meditation easy, and he replied “it depends on the day”, in other words you keep practising meditation whatever the outcome, this is the discipline. You are unattached to the result.
The Practice of Meditation
The practice of meditation is firstly to focus your attention on a single thing – a breath, a mantra, a movement, a flame……the options are many and it doesn’t have to be complicated. You need to focus on something in the present, and do this in a relaxed way, without self-judgement.
As night follows day, your mind will wander. The thing that defines meditation is that you simply notice your mind has wandered, without judgement, without analysis, and bring your attention back to the focus. To begin with this may seem impossible as the mind is so full – however you just keep going, notice and bring your attention back to the focus.
You are training your mind not to hang onto and be seduced by everything you think. Whatever comes up during the meditation, whatever the distraction internal or external, you notice and take your attention back to the focus. Through this you learn to simply witness your own process without judgement, and then let go.
This process helps you to be more in the here and now, the act of noticing can only happen in the present.
There are some things to do that can really support you. Firstly, be relaxed, be comfortable – you are not in a Zen monastery, you don’t need to get into a lotus position. It is good to sit upright with your back supported, feet on the ground, and imagine you are held up by a piece of string attached to your crown, and from that let everything drop. You could use the Buddha as a template for an upright yet relaxed posture.
The next thing that really helps is association. To help ourselves to sleep we do things we associate with sleep. If you meditate lying down your brain will be preparing itself for sleep. You need to find things that your mind will associate with meditation. It could be a particular time of day, a special location, some might light a candle or an incense stick. This is not for some spiritual purpose, only to find things your brain only associates with meditation.
Another help is repetition. Stick with the same meditation focus for a while, keep your routine, keep at it whatever the result, don’t give up.
The benefits are that you may increase your present moment awareness through the practice, increasing your ability to focus on the hear and now rather than the past and the future. You may begin to experience more inner calm or inner silence. You might notice your breathing relaxes. You might increase your resilience with the ability to notice thoughts and feelings and let them go, increasing non-judgemental acceptance. So, increasing your awareness and reducing stress.
You might find moments in a meditative state, a place of complete calm and no thought. But remember, these are possible outcomes and not your goal.
Now Try This
Let’s try something simple to get you started. We will take just five minutes. You could set an alarm so as not to be worried about the time.
Find a place to sit comfortably as described above. Take a couple of deep breaths to settle yourself.
Find the spot two fingers below your belly button. Place your middle finger there. You could try to imagine a colour for that point if it helps your focus. Now breathe into that spot, feeling your lower belly expand and contract.
Maintain your focus here. If your mind wonders, simply notice it, without self-judgement and bring your attention back to the focus. It doesn’t matter how many times this happens. Just be kind to yourself. There is nothing you can do wrong.
At the end of the five minutes congratulate yourself on completing the meditation and move on. Try to make a contract with yourself to repeat this regularly.
Michael Eales, 2024
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